Perfection, Pulses, and Perspective

 The image above is a tongue-in-cheek take on beauty ideals—a fashion moment with a crow on my head—or rather, on a wire cage. The text on the cover (would be) reads, “Perfect skin. Perfect body.”But the expression says something else: about appearances and play, freedom and entrapment, and beauty you can’t measure. foto Erica Fraaije 2023.

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It feels so good to write again. After weeks of organising, fixing things, working hard, focusing—and yes, pushing myself—it’s a relief to pause and reflect. Why do I keep doing this to myself? Sometimes, my husband and I feel like we’re in a tunnel. A long one. It’s been dark for quite a while, but with spring arriving, there’s a bit of light at the end.

We’re both working hard to build our dreams. He’s an inventor developing a pharmaceutical tool; I’m pouring my energy into promoting and shaping my ideas about art—whatever that might mean on any given day. Maker, artist, collector, storyteller?

This morning I rolled out of bed and, twenty minutes later, found myself suited up at the Bodytec studio. It’s a super-efficient strength training method using electric impulses that activate your muscles through a fitted suit. The electricity works best when your body is well-hydrated, so drinking water is essential. But I had no time, so I grabbed a double espresso instead. Yes, I know coffee dehydrates. Tea would’ve been better. But I was already out the door.

Before class, I chatted with two women in my time slot. I mentioned how hard I’ve been working and how I feel for younger people who seem forced to live so efficiently these days—consistently productive, continually optimised. I’ve tried so many different things in life that wouldn’t even be possible now.

One of the women smiled and said, “But you’re playing along, aren’t you?” Touché. That landed. Because yes—I am playing along. I train with electric pulses, track my time, and structure my life into blocks.

Maybe the younger generation gets it better than I do. They seem to understand that it starts with a mindset. You can’t say the world needs to change without changing how you think and act first. What do I want, then? More calm? More awareness? More connection?

And yet—there’s still that drive. That project, that exhibition, that next step. I tell myself often, “You already are who you want to be.”But something stirs underneath. It's not exactly a bucket list—I hate that term—but a kind of curiosity and hunger. What’s still left to bloom?

So yes, I’ll keep training. And now, I’ll have a glass of water instead of coffee. I care for my body, almost manically at times. I treat my body as my assembly, technically holding everything together to be motivated as well as possible. I’ve seen what happens when people around me lose that strength, that drive. I don’t want to pass that on—not to the people I love or the world around me.

I work on myself every day. Not because I want to be perfect, but because I want to stay open and connected to my body, others, and the fire inside me.

Maybe that’s the opposite of perfection.

📸 The image above is a tongue-in-cheek take on beauty ideals—a fashion moment with a crow on my head—or rather, on a wire cage. The text on the cover reads, “Perfect skin. Perfect body.”But the expression says something else: about appearances and play, freedom and entrapment, and beauty you can’t measure. (Aged and caged?)

📬 Want to read more like this? Subscribe to my blog to receive invites, thoughts, stories, and glimpses from the studio—floating somewhere between art and life.👉

🖼️ Coming soon…Later this spring, I’ll be sharing more about my upcoming Public open-home exhibition, a personal and playful presentation of my work throughout the ground floor of our house. It will be a moment to celebrate, connect, and reflect together, with art, stories, and maybe even live music.

Stay tuned and ( sign up if you like) —I'd love for you to participate.

🛒 And something else is coming…

I’m also preparing to launch my online shop, where selected works and art prints will soon be available - each piece paired with a story. A small number of excellent fine art prints will be available, more details coming soon.

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